Afghanistan the Beautiful

Suppose Judge Roy Moore had been born in Afghanistan? No doubt he'd be decrying the moral collapse of the Califate! Taking a litle liberty with Moore's poem, I created the Afghan version.

Afghanistan the Beautiful

-- A Poem by Mullah Royolla Omoor

Afghanistan the Beautiful,

or so you used to be.

Land of the Taliban's pride;

I'm glad they'll never see.

Women dating men,

Un-burqua'd on demand,

Oh, sweet land of Terrorism;

your mosque is on the sand.

Our children wander aimlessly

flaunting Allah's rules for boys

poisoned by kite flying,

Choosing to play with toys.

In Hindu Kush and Kandahar,

From teaching love of camels

our Nation turns away,

Watching television with rebels.

We've knocked Buddha out of Banyan,

yet how indolent we've grown.

When Christians, Jews and infidels

smoke the opium we've sewn.

We've voted in a government

and appointed Godless Judges

who forget to forbid sundaes

and the eating of hot fudges!

Too soft to bury an adulterer

up to her neck in mud,

yet soft enough to buy a CD

of the Rolling Stones or Bee Gees.

You think that Allah's not angry,

that our land's a moral slum?

How much longer must we wait

before slicing off more thumbs?

How are we to face Osama,

whom Americans cannot find?

What then is left for us to do,

but flog an infidel's behind?

If we the chosen few,

can humbly return and spill

The blood of every foreigner

and make them cry most shrill

Then Osama will hear from Pakistan

and impose Sharia law.

One and all must face the lash

Except oilmen with sufficient cash

But, Afghanistan the Beautiful,

if you don't - then you will see,

A sad Mullah Omar

withdraw His scimitar from Thee.